Jesse Reeves (talamascanjesse) wrote in desvampires,
Jesse Reeves
talamascanjesse
desvampires

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Jesse and Nicki travelling again

Nicki's exclamation of "take me" had brought a curve to the edges of Jesse's mouth. She hadn't realized he'd wanted the violin, or the mirror for that matter. His reaction led her to believe he'd leave them in that field.

But when he ran back to get him, she was sure of two things- that she definitely, and unfortunately cared for him, and that he was not completely insane.

She wound her arms around Nicki's waist and willed them both upward, away from the field. No more than ten minutes later they touched back down, standing now in the desert near to Maharet's home- but not near enough for it to be a concern.

Jesse let go of Nicki, her red hair wild and her eyes wide. She gestured to a boulder that stood near a Joshua tree. Up there, she said to him, not speaking.

This was a place Jesse used to come to talk with Maharet, during the summer she spent with her and with Mael. It was, in her opinion, the best place on the planet to sit and talk, and it was shrouded with important memories and the laughter of those Jesse cared about.

She quickly, easily jumped up onto the rock, not realizing what a labor that climb must have been for her as a mortal. She hadn't been here as a vampire yet.

Jesse looked down over the edge of the thing at Nicki. Well?
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Nicolas stood in wonder when Jesse let go of him. He stumbled of course as he was not expecting it, but it didn't matter. He looked at everything, eyes slightly widened and the same for his mouth. He touched everything that he possibly could, running his hands over some things several times and barely brushing others. There didn't seem to any pattern to it, why he studied one thing and barely looked at another.

Well?"

He heard her voice in his head and looked up startled, almost if he had forgotten that he was not alone. He looked and saw her sitting on a rock. He had no idea where they were, but the location seemed unimportant. He always hated plans anyway, and he didn't need to know everything in the world.

His movements matched hers and within seconds he was on the rock. He took the backpack off and set it between them. He pulled his knees to his chest and rested his chin on his knees, looking at her, waiting for her to say something.
Jesse gave Nicki a small smile. Then she turned and looked out at the horizon, purple and hazy despite the dark night. It was beautiful here. Her favorite place in the world, except maybe for New York.

"I'd like to keep talking to you," she said, calmly, her hair blowing across her lips and her eyes. She pushed it out of the way. "That is, if you'll continue to answer my questions."
"I'll answer what I can," Nicolas agreed ancd folded his arms on top of his knees, making sort of a pillow for his head. He rested for a moment and soon become lost in looking at his surroundings. He caught himself and smiled faintly.

"Sorry, I'm easily distracted," he explained.
"It's alright. It's easy to be distracted here."

And it was. It was gorgeous.

"You can ask me whatever you like, y'know," Jesse said, laying back with her feet still on the ground, knees up. She was watching the stars like she had done so many times that summer, talking with Mael about the taste of cigarettes. Her red hair fanned out around her head like a copper halo. She smiled slightly.

"If you had it to do again, would you still take The Blood?"
Nicolas paused and stared at her for a moment, his face once again completely blank, even the subtle anger gone. He drew his knees tighter to his chest and wrapped his arms around them.

"I wasn't expecting that," he said truthfully. "And honestly, I don't know the answer to that. I want to say probably, yes I probably would. But I never wanted it for all its gifts, I wanted it because Lestat had it and I wanted to be with him. Perhaps if he had told me right away I wouldn't...no, I'd still want it, simply because he had it," Nicolas answered, amazed at his answer. He expected to give a yes or no answer, but he went on and somewhat explained why, and he had no idea why he did that. He wanted to become aggravated, but he found he could not. This environment was too tranquil.

"What about you? If you could do it all over again, would you go to Lestat's concert?" he asked.
Jesse turned her head to look at Nicki.

"In a heartbeat," she said. She took a breath. "I've become so much closer to Maharet, so much more her child than I ever was when I was mortal. And though I miss Miriam every night I open my eyes, I don't regret what I did."

Jesse sighed. "I was passionate about what I studied; I had to have answers. And maybe this isn't the route I had in mind, but I got those answers, for the most part, though I doubt I'll ever be satisfied with them."

Her eyes clouded for a moment. "Though, if maybe I could forego the bit about my neck breaking this time..."

An irresistible grin spread across her face as she watched the stars.

"Who was the first girl you kissed?"

"I would say you were passionate about what you studied if you became what you studied. That's dedication, something no one seems to have anymore," Nicolas said with a slight frown.

"The first girl I kissed?" Nicolas asked in amazement. He had expected anything but that. He blinked a few times and although it was evident he fought against it, he could not help but smile.

"Her name was Adrienne," he said softly. He couldn't help it as he smiled again and he buried his face between his knees. He looked up, once more composed, his face emotionless again.

"And you? What about the first boy you kiss?" he asked. "I have another question and I want to ask before I forget it. Why can you no longer see your mother?" he asked softly as if he were afraid to hurt her feelings. "Mona, Lestat, and a few others are able to see spirits, why can't you? You were a powerful witch, were you not?" he questioned, his eyebrows creasing as if he really was thinking about his question.
Jesse smiled. I knew it. Not ALL apathy. She veiled that thought. But she saw the smile creep across Nicki's face at the thought of his first kiss. That was exactly what she was looking for.

And two questions...

"Two questions?" Jesse chuckled. "Alright. I'll take the easier one first."

She lowered her eyes. "The first boy I kissed was Jonathan. I was 15." Jesse smiled, and realized she was probably blushing as well.

"The question about my mother isn't as easy..." her voice trailed off. Jesse was silent for long while, watching the sky and feeling the wind kiss her forehead. Nicki might have thought she was not going to answer. But she was choosing her words.

"Maharet told me, and all of us, really, that spirits disliked us because were both spirit AND flesh, whereas witches are only flesh with a talent for seeing or hearing spirits. Miriam left me... I'm not sure why... but I'm sure she didn't approve. She begged me to come to her, and not to do what I did."

A few blood tears welled in her pretty green eyes. "In the end I think it was too painful for Miriam to stay, or to allow me to see her any longer. I can still sense things, and I still have vivid dreams, very vivid, that are like visions. But the rest of my power, insofar as I had any as a witch, morphed into this," Jesse said, gesturing to herself, her body.

Jesse wiped the traces of blood from her eyes, blinking a bit.

"Why the violin, Nicki? Why not any other instrument?"


Nicolas looked at her, his face not moving or showing any emotion. He had little clues, however, clues that she probably hadn't picked up on yet. Like when her eyes began to fill up with blood tears, he drew his bottom lip into his mouth to bite it slightly. He felt bad for making her eyes well up but he would show her that. He always asked things without thinking first, and eventually, that broke Lestat. He hadn't realized before how asking questions could be so dangerous.

He looked at her when she asked her question, his eyebrow raising slightly. He unfolded his legs and stretched them out in front of him then leaned back on his elbows.

"I fell in love with it," he answered simply. "I was in Paris, studying like my father expected of me and...oh, you've already heard the story," he said and looked down at the rock.

"What is your favorite color and why?" he asked, not sure of what to say next.
Jesse sat up, crossing her legs underneath her.

"My favorite color?" She grinned. For a moment, Jesse looked again like the 20 year old girl she'd been when she'd first come out here. For a moment, she didn't care about anything-- she was just laughing at the pure honest manner in which Nicki asked her that, and the question itself.

The grin stayed with her, making her seem childlike and vulnerable. "Red," Jesse said, nodding in affirmation. "Because of its meaning in my family, the power of the red hair. And because it's so strong without even trying."

She laughed, a short and even laugh.

"And yours?" Jesse's eyebrow went up, unwittingly.
Nicolas watched her as she explained her favorite color. Her cheerful face, the way she couldn't stop smiling, almost made Nicolas want to smile, but he didn't. He kept his face blank, only tilting his head a little to the side.

"I never really had a favorite color. I was always serious, you know. I was more into studying and later, playing the violin. I don't give much thought to anything. Although, I suppose you could say I liked the color blue because I would play outside all day under the blue sky, but once it became dark my mother would pull me inside." Nicolas laughed. "Apparently, the creatures in the night did get me after all. But as for liking one color, I never really did that."

He tilted his head to look at the sky as he thought of a question. "Do you mind what you are? Do you, like Louis, freak out because you most kill others in order for you to live? When I read Lestat's book you seemed compassionate and gentle, like you never wanted to hurt anyone. Killing, even if you feed rarely, does not go well with compassionate people, I would imagine," Nicolas said.
Jesse didn't hesitate. "I don't mind what I am, no," she said. "I don't lament it. But then again, I didn't have life stolen from me, as Louis believes he did, or as you might say you did. It was this, or death. And while I don't... erm... enjoy that I have to kill to survive, I don't think I hate it, either."

She moved closer to Nicki, almost touching him and not even realizing it. "You say I am compassionate and gentle, which may be true, but that doesn't mean that I will allow myself to feel horribly for something I can't do anything about. I feed rarely, as it is, and when I do... well, you know what it's like. It's better than sex. And I was never ashamed of that, either."

Jesse raised her eyebrow again, looking out over the Joshua trees and the infinity of the landscape, knowing that a few miles away, Maharet was probably sitting, talking with Eric and Mael, listening to poetry recitations or watching films with subtitles, and the thought in itself gave her peace.

She continued looking out in the distance. "Do you... do you resent me for what I did in that field?"
Nicolas looked away from her suddenly, his brown curls flying with the motion of his head. He sat up and slightly turned his body away from her, his long legs bent behind him. He didn't want to think of the bag. Why did he go back and get it? Obviously Jesse didn't care about it, so why should he? Like he said, he did things without thinking and someone always ended up hurt. This time he was the one that was hurt.

"No, I don't resent you," he said softly, tracing patterns on the rock with his long pointer finger. He turned so he was sitting straight, once more looking at Jesse, and he noticed how close she moved. He deeply inhaled and closed his eyes, willing his face to look even more apathetic, if such a thing were possible.

"It would be unfair of me to resent you. I asked, after all, didn't I?" he asked and shrugged.

"I've been meaning to ask you this, and if I already have, I'm sorry, I'm distracted. Have you told Lestat about me?" he asked serious, his eyes filled with some emotion, although it was difficult to which one it was, and perhaps it was more than one, maybe all of them just fixed together. But as soon as he blinked, the look was gone, and once more his eyes were dead.
Jesse watched Nicki trace a pattern on the rock-- something she'd done countless times before. Actually, Jesse was pretty sure that somewhere on this thing, she'd dug out her name.

And it wasn't that she didn't care about the bag-- it wasn't like Jesse had made those drawings for nothing. But in the situation...

Nicki's eyes were frightening. Calm and dead and utterly without light, though Jesse thought, maybe naively, that there was light in him.

She'd seen it, hadn't she?

"Yes, I have told him," Jesse said, gently. "Rather, I told him I believed you were still alive, because of a dream I had. He didn't believe me." She laughed a bit, looking down at her hands, fingers laced together. "He threw me out of his apartment."

She thought of the dream for a moment. She could hear the violin again, and see Nicki playing feverishly, playing too fast. Jesse banished the thought quickly.

A ghost of happiness came over her face, almost cruelly, because Jesse was not happy. There was something she wanted to ask, something she had never asked anyone else. So why not now?

"What was it like," she began, voice quaking slightly, "to grow up with brothers and sisters? With parents?"





Nicolas crossed his arms and brought them on either side of his neck, almost as if he was giving himself a hug. He closed his eyes and let his head drop. Of course she told Lestat. Of course he kicked her out. That was just something he would do. Suddenly, he felt the rage inside of him that he had missed. It went away quickly however, and Nicolas gasped as it went away, his eyes snapped open and he dropped his hands into his lap.

He hardly heard her question, but once he sat silently, it all came to him. He brought his hands to his cheeks and bent over so his elbows were on his knees and he held his head in his hands.

"It was ok, I guess. It was the only life I knew," he said and sat up straight, tucking his feet under him Indian Style. "I had two brothers and one sister, I don't know if Lestat talked about this. I was the oldest, so I was never abused by my brothers like Lestat was. We had a normal relationship, we fought, but it was nothing serious. I was over-protective of my younger sister, she was the baby of the family. I grew closer to her than my brothers. And I think that when I went to Paris to study, it hit her more than anyone," he said and paused. He looked behind Jesse, out into the trees. He sighed and went on.

"I don't think my father liked me very much. He wanted me to be him. He wanted me to go to school, to study, and take over the business. And I started doing it, I don't know why. He made sure I studied, that was his main thing, education. My mother was completely unenlightened. She was very superstitious. She hated me being out after dark, no black cats, nonsense like that," he said and shook his head. He drew in a deep shuttering breath and exhaled slowly.

"Honestly, I never paid much attention to my family. I played with my siblings during the day, but other than that I studied. Aside from Lestat and Gabrielle, I never really loved or felt attached to anyone," he answered. He looked down at the rock. She knew he wasn't insane. He knew that she knew. There was no point in trying to pretend anymore. He let go suddenly, let his face fill with the sadness that he wanted it to. Somehow, his face softened, his mouth tilted down, and his eyes were sad, lost, longing.

"Why are you even bothering to talk to me? Are you just going to record this like you would when you were a Talamascan?" he snapped and stood up, suddenly angry at himself for showing so much of himself to her.

talamascanjesse

13 years ago

_lenfent_

13 years ago

talamascanjesse

13 years ago

_lenfent_

13 years ago

talamascanjesse

13 years ago

_lenfent_

13 years ago

talamascanjesse

13 years ago

_lenfent_

13 years ago

talamascanjesse

13 years ago

_lenfent_

13 years ago